Berti Pleasant

Everything about him is affable, if somewhat loosely defined. But then, that’s part of his charm you see. Good old Bertie. Be nice if you see him.

Thin-necked Youth

Something about this guy reminded me of the ‘pimply teenager’ character from the Simpsons – the one with the semi-broken voice, usually works in the burger bar / ice-cream store / fairground. Anywhere Homer hands over cash for a disappointing experience. Can’t say that happened on the train. Kept my eyes peeled but no sign of a fat, yellow man in blue pants. Bummer.

Bucket Hat

Saw this old sort hanging around outside a newsagent. The shop wasn’t open and he waited around for about 20 minutes, not doing very much other than blinking, looking around and staring at me. Then he wandered off. What a story. I bet you can’t wait for the next installment.

I Just Can’t Believe This Crap

I can’t believe they call this journalism! Someone oughta do somehting about this. I have a good mind to write to the editor of this rag, straighten them out. Send them back to school, that’s what I’d do, and not let them pick up a pen until they know what they’re about.

George Bernard P’shaw

Due the abnormally large size of my forehead, I am inclined to lean forward and furrow my brow. Humph